I keep thinking to myself “Oh, I have a little time to myself this evening, I really should sit down and write another post; or that short story I keep menaing to start; or … well… just anything, really.”
And then I get a slightly good idea for a blog post, and then… I read someone else’s blog and I think “Shit, that was good, why can’t I write something like that?”, and I get put off, and start emptying the dishwasher and sorting the laundry out instead…
And then, later, I realise I started this with a view to posting at least every day.
Then I let myself slip to thinking once a week, then once a fortnight….was OK …
But that’s not why I started this blog. I started this blog to log my life (remember…?) ; and at the time was giving “750 words” a go. And, I looked at my posting history and it has just dropped off. So sod it, I’m posting uninteresting drivel again just for the heck of it. Because I can!
In other news. Remember THIS post? Just in case anyone was wondering, I didn’t get offered any of the parts. One (in fact, the one who specifically said they’d be contacting everyone with feedback), I heard nothing from at all; just saw the castings posted with who they’d chosen; and two of the other auditionees I know told me afterwards they had both received a no but also feedback. Not sure what happened there… (not trying to name and shame, just a little confused…). The other two productions were very pleasant and gave the usual polite spiel .. you know, the “we’d like to keep hold of your details” type of thing.
And … I don’t feel bad. I survived. I’m not bitter. Years ago I’d be in a black mood for weeks, kicking myself, threatening self-harm and all sorts of “They don’t know what they’re missing…I could do that standing on my head…”
Which, to me, is growth.
I’m getting somewhere! (Just not on to any of those particular sets very soon…!)